Loss

The funny thing about losing somebody you love is that your whole world seems to crash around you, yet it affects nobody but you. You're shocked, you're upset, you're angry. You want them back and you miss them, but everyone else...they're fine.

Today I was on facebook when I read some people's statuses. I'm not sure why, but I was mildly surprised that they were...normal. They were happy and...NORMAL. It was only then that I realised that the loss is only my own and my family's. I may be mourning the death of my grandad, but my aquaintances aren't. They didn't know him and, though it seems difficult to believe, they didn't care about him. Perhaps they care about me and my feelings, but not my grandad. And that's okay.

The world doesn't revolve around me. When I'm sad, not everyone else is. If I cry, other people don't. When I'm in mourning, other people aren't, and I was foolish to assume that they would be. It's just difficult to imagine a normal world where everything's okay, but in a way...it's reassuring. It's comforting to know that the world goes on and that we humans carry on.

It's only now that I fully appreciate Gerard Way's words : "We'll carry on, we'll carry on, and though you're dead and gone believe me, your memory will carry on."

We will all love and miss you forever, grandad.